This is an excellent question. (Feynman, by the way. If you've never heard of him, look him up. He's a brilliant physicist, witty and engaging speaker, and rather creepy as a person). The strange thing is that when it comes to thinking about it, I really don't care what others think of me. But my behavior is completely different. I care a lot what others think of me, even complete strangers.
It doesn't make rational sense, but I seem to have a fear that someone's impression will affect their behavior toward me. Of course it will, but it's not the end of the world to have people know that you are less than perfect. It's only the truth. How can it feel so damaging?
On the flip side, making a fool of yourself can often be rewarding. It requires guts, to be sure, to head out to an activity alone, hoping against all hope that other people will see and join you. I know that feeling all too well. It's a combination of humiliation, from playing a multi-person game alone and the inability to draw more people, and pride, in playing a game I love enough to make a fool of myself.
Also, without caring what other people think, complements have no meaning. A complement from a close friend means a lot. And when it's something as broad as "I like the way you live your life," well, I can't help but care. I'm glad to have friends who know me well enough and whose opinions I care about enough that that kind of a complement totally makes my day. So thanks.
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